Here Comes the Night Train!

(You're stupid! And you're gonna be stupid AND dead!)


Genius Party (2007)

(By segment. The shorts have nothing to do with one another so you won't need any general elucidating.)


Genius Party (2007)

Rating ... D (17)

[ One day when I visit Japan I will make it a priority to inquire why in every animated anthology of shorts the first must always be a pointless franchise announcement, here to herald the presence of all the rest - e.g. Robot Carnival, Neotokyo. I don't mean to imply that the five minutes was a complete waste of time but it's tough considering the metaphor stacks up with the animators as an electrical pulse galvanating the otherwise dull axons and dendrites (you, the audience) that make up the brain of a deranged bird (also you, the audience, albeit collectively) who happens to be strolling through a desert on its way to nowhere. (i.e. your otherwise shitty life, audience members!) Simply put, animation is a huge bright spot in my movie-watching career, and I am overjoyed that animation is a huge bright spot in my movie-watching career ... however, I do not require animation to reiterate to me that animation is a huge bright spot in my movie-watching career. Good riddance, etc. ]

Shanghai Dragon (2007)

Rating ... D (14)

[ Oddly enough, I also do not require an animation that further expands on the Role of the Animator, in this case the animator as a Talented but Ostracized and Misunderstood Genius. A young, socially awkward boy discovers a writing utensil imbued with a mystical shard that solves all his problems, including enabling him to draw food and have it spawn right in front of him. (Jesus parallel, oshiiiiiiiiii--) I'm glad animation helped you cope with all your childhood woes, animators, now if we could just cease with this irritating meta wankery. You mean humans from the apocalyptic future will revisit this time period and harvest the *incredibly imaginative!* animators that created this short? Oh. Please no. Anything but that, futuristic humans. Anything. ]

Deathtic 4 (2007)

Rating ...

[ Coming Soon ... at least, whenever I can find it. I will be eternally grateful to any scrupulous readers who can point me in the right direction for obtaining this and Limit Cycle. Maybe. ]

Doorbell (2007)

Rating ... B (62)

[ At last, a legitimate story. Nothing fancy, just a pleasing rumination on pre-marriage jitters and the melancholy of binding decisions, unopened doors, the like, easily abstracted beyond just matrimony. Somebody in the Touching Symbolism department showed up for work; unfortunately so did the folks in charge of the Ponderous Dialogue That Expounds the Nature of the Premise division. Sounds like mush, I know. See for yourself, you had to be there, etc. Would have been higher had the animation not looked like ass. What gives, People That Draw Better Than Other People unit? ]

Limit Cycle (2007)

Rating ...

[ TK ]

Happy Machine (2007)

Rating ... B- (57)

[ Decent, but more or less an interpretation playground, at least as far as the particulars of maturity are concerned. Presumably the fiery fellow is emblematic of sibling rivalry, or at very least somebody that couldn't hack it in school. (The school of fish, that is - note this concept of people losing their marbles in school probably makes more sense in Japan, or somewhere other than No Child Left Behind land.) Undoubtedly that wonky machine is the first car, though I honestly have no idea the goal of the green insectoid. (It looks similar in form to the car so at first I thought it was a small, efficient, "green" car, hence why it recycles our hero's urine WTF WTF WTF WTF! Then again, he never rides it. I got served!) Best part is likely the old man ending, not solely because it features less in the way of baby noises and gurgling, but rather because all the incidents from prior in the story resurface as dangling occupants in the new child's mobile - a keen observation on the goal of a parent to pass on knowledge and understanding to their progeny. Apparently, in Japan, fatherhood = resigning oneself to the economic machine, never to see one's child ever again. All Japanese children grew up alone. Also, childhood drawn as animation, adulthood portrayed as live-action. Of all people, the animators aren't even on my side in that debate? Sheesh. ]

Baby Blue (2007)

Rating ... A- (89)

[ Reviewed with Powers of Ten (1968). ]